The 1st Football

This Dane whose name, under the circumstances, could not have been recorded for posterity, was a member of the armed forces of the "dastardly aggressor" of the moment. England was occupied by the victorious Danes, a condition which lasted form 1016 to 1042 A.D.; and during that period, this unknown father of football died and was buried on the battlefield. Time passed. The British rose again to drive the aggressors into the seas, and the unknown Danish GI moldered in his grave. Some time latter, an Englishman, digging in the old battlefield, unearthed the skull of this Dane; and muttering about unpleasant memories of the days of the occupation, proceeded to kick the skull around the pasture (Treat, 1962). Other Englishmenjoined in the fun, and some youngsters, watching this new pastime, dug farther until other Danish skulls were found. Soon everyone in the township was kicking a skull, an this sport continued until toes became more painful than the smoldering hatred of the Danes. It was not long before some minor inventive genius of the time produced the inflated bladder of a cow to take the place of the skulls; and thus the head of the unknown Dane, used to create the embryo of football, passed into disuse.